For the last couple weeks I have been spending significantly less time on the computer. But I feel like I still can't keep up. I feel like I'm running the kids around all the time, but I can't recall specifically why. Getting out of the house on time, with all the kids (and me) dressed, teeth brushed, hair combed, diapers clean, bladders empty, bellies full, takes some sort of herculean effort. My house is a mess, despite my best efforts, and I feel overwhelmed by it. I feel like I'm drowning in clutter. Going to book club for a few hours shouldn't take so much out of me, should it?! I try so hard to get my workouts in, but only manage about 3 days a week. Where is all my time going?!?!
On a positive note, I watched my friend Wendy's son Peter for the day a couple weeks ago. (Which, by the way, is not work at all. He just kept my kids entertained for the day, so I didn't have to). Wendy is a massage therapist and gave me a gift certificate for a free 1 hour massage. I always feel all my stress in this one spot in my back, it is so tight and painful right now. I'm going to have a massage next week!! (Imagine angels singing hallelujah right now...I can't wait!)
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Regarding the clutter, been there. I eventually recognized the futility of stressing over it, so I continued to do my best to teach the kids to be tidy and pick up, but beyond that, I just started stepping over it. Eventually the above teaching did take hold, and the kids either learned (you are proof) or they moved out. Either way, life did get easier and tidier... for a while. See, along about age 45-50 you get old and stiff, so personal preparation necessary to get yourself out of the house takes about as long as it used to take for you and the kids before. And, all the kid clutter is replaced with an over-abundance of your own junk, which is heavier and more combersome. Wish it was better news, but life is hard and then you die.
Dad
P.S. I'm just being facetious. Really, I love my uncluttered, slow life.
Becky, it's called 4 kids, one of which is pretty new! I can't imagine how I would function, or not function, if I had that many. I'm sure you're doing a great job. Sure, some things go undone, but I bet everyone is still taken care of and happy. Just remind yourself that it is all temporary and you are doing the best that you can. Also be thankful that you are at home during the day to at least get some things accomplished. I don't know how families with 2 working parents do it. I can understand how some families end up eating take-out all of the time. I also think things will improve for you when Naomi isn't so small and dependent. That takes a lot out of you. Just look at how independent Maggie is and how little time it took her to get to that place. Hang in there! You're doing a great job.
PS - We'll be staying in Spokane probably on 6/13. It's a good halfway point to Portland and probably all we can expect Piper to do happily in one day. I'll keep you posted, but maybe we could do take-out of some sort at your house so the kids can play and we can visit. And don't worry about cleaning it, your house is still probably cleaner than mine some days.
I know the feeling. In fact I've been meaning to schedule another massage with Wendi soon, too! You're going to love it, she does a great job.
I will say this: SOME HOW, (and I really don't get it) it was WAY easier to stay on top of things like house, cooking, shopping, etc when I was working full-time. I think it was because I was VERY AWARE of my limited time. Being home all day, I feel like I will do this after I do that which will be just as soon as I finish what I am doing... then things take so long, tantrums (or snuggle time) get had, all that sort of thing. I feel like my brain is in as much clutter too! It is INSANE! Anyway, I only have 2 children, and I CAN NOT imagine having 4 six and under. Holy cow. That you even get dressed is a miracle to me. I will be honest, sometimes my getting dressed is putting on a clean pair of pajamas. And you totally deserve that massage. In fact, you should book another for 3 weeks from when you get your free one! It will give you a mark to work toward every 3 weeks!
PS- I dont even belong to a gym, so you have me beat there too.
Oh Becky, I feel the SAAAAAAAAAME WAY! Being the mom and balancing it all is SO HARD. I went on a girls night out a few week-ends ago, and came home to an absolute disaster, and I quickly realized that my 3-hour escape was not worth the price I would pay for the next three days!!!
I don't have any answers for you, but I would like to say that working out 3 days a week is enough to keep your body healthy & strong, so you should be proud of that! It seems like your priorities are in the right place- with home and family at the top of the list- so just hang in there and try to enjoy the ride! This too shall pass, and they are so adorable that you really don't want it to pass by any quicker than it does, right?! Keep on keepin' on, and know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!
And happy late birthday to Ray; he is the cutest Dad EVER! :)
Becky, I feel like that on so many days. It feels like an endless cycle of nonsense... I clean the same things over and over until I am about insane. The kids can make messes about ten times faster than I can clean to keep up with them. So many days I don't even try to clean and I just let it pile up until it gets bad enough that we can't stand it anymore. I find myself at the end of the days wondering what I did all day too... especially when I try to tell Jez about what I did and I realize it sounds like nothing. I am so grateful he is patient with me. I don't know that I would be so understanding if it were the other way around. I'm sure I would be like "it's not that hard to just keep the dishes clean. You have all day..."
Our older kids are getting better and Josie is now potty trained so we only have one in diapers which has been a huge relief. I think it does get easier as they get older. I see the glimpses of hope as the time goes on. :) I think you and Ray are amazing parents and your kids are so cute! Hang in there and enjoy your massage!
When you figure out where your time went let me know. I experience the same thing but one diaper less. I have been doing a lot of prep work for the next day, if I know I am going to be going out, the night before. Most nights I am too tired to do the dishes it seems, especially when Colin is at work in the evenings. Great job working out 3 times a day. I can't wait for school to be over for Mia.
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